I’ve been getting a lot of requests to do TV show reviews, and I’ve finally given in-- besides, what better way to kick off Tut’s Tutillating Television Reviews than my absolute favorite show, Firefly? A quick backstory: I actually watched Serenity, the film adaptation of this great show, before I was able to see any of the episodes. But even though the story kind of lost me, I was incredibly intrigued by the characters and the feel of the movie. It made me want to watch more. So I queued up an episode of Joss “The Boss” Whedon’s cult hit on Netflix, and... I found God. In the form of Malcom Reynolds, sure, but I found God. If you know me, you know I can find flaws in anything (literally-- ANYTHING). I can nitpick even my favorite movies. But I can truthfully say this right here and now: Even my favorite movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark, technically scores a 9.957/10 on the Anus-O-Meter. No movie has ever gotten past that. But Firefly is the full ten. It is, in a word, perfect.
Firefly is the story of Malcom Reynolds (Nathan Fillion), the captain of the Firefly-class transport ship Serenity. Mal was a so-called ‘browncoat’ back in an intergalactic war for independence, which he lost. After the war, he and his old war cohort Zoe (Gina Torres) bought Serenity in order to “Never have to be under the heel of nobody ever again.” Also along for the ride are Wash, the pilot and Zoe’s husband, Jayne, a freelance mercenary who is both crude and lovable, and Kaylee, the engineer, a hippie-dippy overalls-wearing girl who is in tune with machines. At the beginning of the show, Serenity picks up a doctor, a preacher, and already has a certified prostitute staying on board.
This show is a religion. I will just say that now so there will be no confusion. Watching an episode of Firefly every week is my version of going to church. Literally everything works in this show. Firstly: The concept. Firefly may be sci-fi, but it’s really a western. The free spirit of the series is the same kind of goosebump-inducing John Wayne kind of feel you’d expect from a western IN SPACE. It works this concept into everything, and it weaves this mind-blowingly realistic idea remarkably well. Sure, there are spaceships-- but there are also horses, powder weapons, and distinctly western phrases. “Gorram mudders!”
Which brings me to the dialogue. HOLY SHIT, is it ever inspired. Every second of every episode clinks along perfectly, with no awkward or tongue-in-cheek moments. It’s easily the most quotable television series of all time, giving the world such memorable lines as “Curse your sudden yet inevitable betrayal!” and “Not as deceivin’ as a low-down... dirty... deceiver.” I get chills when I hear dialogue as good as this. It is incredibly realistic and has a lot of range-- the show can go from being a drama to a comedy in 30 seconds flat.
All of the characters are written well, and it’s their personality quirks and backstories that make the show what it is. Usually a show will have one character who you say “Yeah, that guy... not so much.” Firefly does not have that guy. Every character is likable, funny, and relatable in some way. They are clearly defined, and you know exactly what they want out of life. But Malcom Reynolds... Malcom motherfucking Reynolds... wow. Rarely does a TV character have the depth that Nathan Fillion gives his tortured captain. Although the character is clearly written to be bitter about his loss in the war, Fillion gives him a Han Solo-y likability that is just absolutely intangible, but is a thrill ride to watch. He pretends that all he wants is to make money and go on his way, but you know that inside, he’s a far deeper man than that. This performance is a fucking tour de force, but it doesn’t completely outperform the rest of the cast, who are also incredible. Altogether, this is the best ensemble cast of all time, playing fantastic characters with the best dialogue ever written, directed by the God of the Nerds, with a killer premise. You see now why I have 100% lost my shit over this show.
The special effects are campy, but THAT’S THE POINT. Unfortunately, this is probably what killed the show. Even with its cartoony effects (which work incredibly well), it had a massive budget. And this is why the FUCKING GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING SHIT... FUCK... AAAAAAAAARGH... FOX Network cancelled it. Those words bring tears to my eyes. This show is such a good-hearted, lovable, fantastic experience, and FOX killed it. Why must this company destroy ALL that is good in the world? FUCK! Firefly, in the most idiotic decision of all time, was cancelled after only fourteen episodes. Not only that, but FOX aired them out of of order, gave the show a horrible time slot, and didn’t allow it to pick up any momentum before lowering the boom.
How much do I love this show? Let’s get this straight: If I had a time machine and could go back to reverse only ONE event in human history, I wouldn’t think about it for a second. Fuck killing Hitler, or Saddam Hussein, or Stalin-- I would travel to 2001 and tell FOX not to cancel Firefly. That is how good this shit is. Final Score for my religion: 100/10 stars. This show is a religious experience for anyone who calls themselves a nerd. It is spectacular. There are dozens of high points in the series, but my head could explode trying to pinpoint a low moment. It is a rollercoaster ride that never stops, or SHOULD never have stopped... fuck it. I will say this in closing: Even though I hate sappy shit, there are some of these moments in Firefly. And somehow, it actually got me to feel something. Elation? Joy? Those words do not cover it. This show touched my very fucking soul. Yes, I have a soul (dark as it may be). Firefly is the most absolutely amazing thing you will ever see. Prefuckingpare yourself.
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